Someone has been anonymously leaving photos of Donald Trump next to piles of dog poop in Chicago’s River North neighborhood, fueling public speculation and raising a shitload of questions.
Are the photos of Donald Trump being left as a warning for people not to step in the dog poop? Is this some sort of partisan political commentary? Is this Trumpoop Bandit™ [you’re welcome] comparing people who don’t clean up after their dogs to the 45th President of the United States? What does he or she think of the new GOP tax plan? Are these photos of The Don being left by the irresponsible dog owner who’s not picking up after their dog? Does someone just carry around a bag full of Trump photos to add to all of the neighborhood dog poops?
How long has the mystery Trumpoop Bandit™ been flagging poop? In a thread on Reddit over the weekend, user leaveittobever says that it’s nothing new, claiming to have seen these Trumpoops™ “on and off in River North and Gold Coast for a few years.”
Over on Everyblock, reporter Tatiana Walk-Morris is trying to track down the Trumpoop Bandit™, using journalism as an excuse. “I’ve lived on Dearborn Street for the past few years, and I’m working on a story about the Trump poop flags for the Chicago Sun-Times,” followed by a call-to-action in search of information on the subject.* So if you want to be a snitch, here’s your chance. But remember… stitches would likely soon follow.
No matter who the Trumpoop Bandit™ is, the real lesson here is to clean up after your dog, you slob. Seriously though, if you don’t pick up your dog poop you are a monster.
* If you or your neighbors want to comment on the story (whether it’s about the poop problem itself, or specifically the Trumpoop Bandit™), please email Tatiana Walk-Morris at the Chicago Sun Times.
“Thanks in advance for your help with this,” is probably what Walk-Morris would have us convey to our readers, had we even bothered trying to contact her.