Hear Ye, Hear Ye: The Triumphant Return of Butter StamosYou butter believe it *ba dum tss*
You didn’t think we would leave the greatest butter sculpture in existence out of our birthday festivities, did you? The trumpets toot true: Butter Stamos will return at Riot Fest 2019 in all his buttery, slippery glory.
Butter sculptor Jim Victor will return once more to sculpt an ungodly amount of butter into a godly-looking man, and you get to watch. You’re welcome. Come to Riot Fest this weekend and see a butter sculpture of John Stamos. After all, Riot Fest is the only festival with a butter sculpture of John Stamos.
Look, you can even see where Butter Stamos will be located on this year’s handy-dandy map. You saw the map, didn’t you? Just checking. Here it is anyways: