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When Does A Joke Become A Dad Joke?

When Does A Joke Become A Dad Joke?

June 15, 2017 (May 18, 2020) // Riot Fest

In honor of Father’s Day (June 21, 2020), we made you a list of horrible/wonderful groan worthy dad jokes. But that brings up the question, when does a joke become a dad joke? When the punchline becomes apparent.

  • What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
  • I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
  • What has eight arms and plays bass in a punk band? Squid Vicious.
  • You’re American when you go into the bathroom, and you’re American when you come out, but do you know what you are while you’re in there? European.
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • Hear about the new restaurant on the Moon? The food was great, but there was just no atmosphere.
  • Our wedding was so beautiful. Even the cake was in tiers.
  • How do you organize an outer space party? You planet!
  • I was thinking about moving to Moscow, but there’s no point in Russian into things.
  • Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
  • A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”
  • I just watched a documentary about beavers. It was the best dam show I ever saw!
  • Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.
  • Two guys walked into a bar, the third one ducks.
  • I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
  • Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans!
  • What do you call a factory that sells passable products? A satisfactory.
  • How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
  • What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
  • A termite walks into a bar and asks, “Is the bar tender here?”
  • Two peanuts were walking in a park. One was a salted.
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
  • Why can’t you have a nose 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot
  • I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got fired because I took a couple of days off.
  • A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, “First offender?” She says, “No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!”
  • How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
  • I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!
  • What did the horse say after it tripped? “Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”
  • Don’t trust atoms. They make up everything!
  • How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles.
  • Velcro? It’s a total ripoff.
  • What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison.
  • The Energizer Bunny just got arrested. They charged him with battery.
  • I gave all my dead batteries away. They were free of charge!

The Related Rabbit Hole

About The Author
Riot Fest

Punk Rock (& more) Music Fest | I'm sorry we didn't book the exact bands you wanted, in the exact order you wanted, in the exact location you wanted, for free.

Posted in RandomTagged dad, dad jokes, dads, father's day, father's day gifts

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