For a brief-but-amazing time today, Twitter was broken. Over those enlightening thirty minutes or so, you couldn’t tweet your stupid thoughts, you couldn’t scroll through your stupid feed, and therefore, you couldn’t see what stupid thoughts other stupid people were tweeting.
It was brilliant.
Twitter controlled the damage by telling us that something was “technically wrong.” Technically, something was so, so right.
During the glorious half-hour when Twitter was down, I went outside for the first time in weeks and breathed in some fresh air. I’d forgotten what the blue sky looked like (it looks amazing). I stopped to smell some roses in my garden on the way back inside; not only did they smell delightful, but I didn’t even know that we had a garden!
So while Twitter promises that things will be “back to normal soon,” maybe they shouldn’t be. Maybe they should just shut down forever. After all, while Twitter was down today I actually tried a cantaloupe for the first time instead of just blindly tweeting about it. You’re not going to believe this, but I have to say: It was delicious.
Okay, I have to go; it looks like Twitter is back up, and I need to tweet about it.
Twitter is down and it makes me so happy.
— Riot Fest (@RiotFest) April 17, 2018