Our boss, Riot Mike, may not trust his employees enough to share any of upcoming Riot Fest announcements, but he trusts you enough to share his All-American Burger Recipe. We’ve tried it here in the office on many occasions, and not only are they delicious, but they are truly a unique American original. So crank up our Fourth of July playlist, and start preparing the item that will truly blow all of your guests’ red-white-and-blue crap out of the swimming pool.
- 2 All-Beef Patties
- 1 oz. Mayonnaise
- 1 oz. Thousand Island Dressing
- 2 oz. Iceberg Lettuce, Shredded
- 2 Slices Cheese, American
- 1 Pickle, Sliced
- 1 White Onion, Diced
- 1 Sesame Seed Bun
- In a bowl-shaped container, whisk the mayonnaise and Thousand Island dressing until it’s a special, familiar color; set aside.
- Slice the burger buns to leave a top, a bottom, and a middle piece; Toast all three pieces until golden brown.
- Place all-beef patties on the grill, and cook to desired temperature. Medium-rare recommended.
- Spread the mayonnaise-Thousand Island dressing mixture evenly across the the bottom bun; then top topped with diced onion, lettuce, one of the all-beef patties, the cheese slice, and a couple discs of sliced pickle. Place the middle bun on top of the patty.
- Fifth verse, same as the fourth! Place middle bun on top of all that, and then repeat step 4.
- Serve with a smile.
- Clean up.
- Reunite the Misfits *
You’re done! It should look something like this:
Now go on, get out of here, and show your friends how much of a true patriot you really are!
* Step 8 is optional